Review: White Lines by Jennifer Banash + Giveaway!

White Lines by Jennifer Banash

Release Date: April 4, 2013
Publisher: Putnam Juvenile
Pages: 304
Genre: YA Realistic Fiction
Source: ARC
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A gritty, atmospheric coming of age tale set in 1980s New York City Seventeen-year-old Cat is living every teenager’s dream—she has her own apartment on the Lower East Side and at night she’s club kid royalty, guarding the velvet rope at some of the hottest clubs in the city. The night with its crazy, frenetic, high-inducing energy—the pulsing beat of the music, the radiant, joyful people and those seductive white lines that can ease all pain—is when Cat truly lives. But her daytime, when real life occurs, is more nightmare than dream. Having spent years suffering her mother’s emotional and physical abuse, and abandoned by her father, Cat is terrified and alone—unable to connect to anyone or anything. But when someone comes along who makes her want to truly live, she’ll need to summon the courage to confront her demons and take control of a life already spinning dangerously out of control. Both poignant and raw, White Lines is a gripping tale and the reader won’t want to look away.

ADD TO GOODREADS

Caitlin is 17 and living on her own. Her father moved away and her mother is really abusive so her father agrees to pay for her apartment. Why her father thought she should live alone at such a young age is beyond me. Cat feels abandoned and unloved. There are flashbacks with her mother throughout the book that really show it was probably best for her to get away. The only place she feels loved and like she really fits in is the club. 

 I could relate to Cat wanting to be at the club. When I turned 18 I lived at the club on the weekends. I was never popular in high school but at the club I really fit in and made friends. But I wasn't clubbing on school nights. Cat works at the club until 2am or sometimes even 4am and then tries to make it to class at 8am. There is just no way that is healthy. Not to mention the drug use. Cat explains how it started slow and she tried to do it on special occasions but now she is doing it every night. The way the drugs help her forget. We just watch her spiral downwards but as the saying goes someone has to hit rock bottom before they realize they need help.

Cat meets a new boy named Julian at school. Julian is kind of an outcast too and they begin a friendship. Julian was super sweet and adorable and their romance even gave me butterflies. Cat is very broken though so she often pushes him away. Cat does have a few good friends such as Giovanni. There are flashbacks of how she met him and got into the club scene. How it feels for her to be there. The writing was gorgeous and depressing but really descriptive of how Cat feels and how the drugs make her feel better if only for a little while. She begins to hit bottom. The way older club owner hits on her and she sees that one of her best friends has things way worse. Cat finally begins to see she needs help. As the synopsis says the book was very poignant and raw but so beautifully told.



"I would die of embarrassment if I had to wear this outfit on the street in broad daylight, but the club is a place where anything is possible."

"Standing there in front of him, I begin to believe maybe for the first time that he just might really like me. It's in those eyes, the way they take me in--not just my body and face, but all of me. Even the parts I don't want anyone to see. It makes me feel nervous and exhilarated all at once."

"At that moment, Julian leans close to me, our shoulders touching, his hair brushing my cheek. When I turn to look into his eyes, he slowly lowers his lips to mine. I close my eyes and breathe in the scent of shampoo and Ivory soap as he cups one hand under my chin, his fingers reaching up to brush the hair back from my face. At the feeling of his hands on my skin, all nervousness falls away. We are kissing softly, Julian's hands touching me tentatively as if I might bolt. Something in his kiss, in the way he looks at me, makes me feel worlds away from the girl I know that I am, the girl with the screwed-up family and the weird job, the girl who can't feel much of anything except the disappointment and fear. When we finally come up for air, I open my eyes to find his lashes fluttering as if he's just woken from a dream, the kind you try to find again after waking in the morning light.
"Wow," he whispers, dropping my hands for the first time all night and pushing his dark hair back from his face.

"Sitting here with a man who is old enough to be my father, a man who possesses that same smug sense of entitlement as my parents, I know that I have become my worst self, a girl who will do anything to avoid looking at her own frightened reflection in the mirror. A girl who runs away, straight into the dark of an eclipse, just to have someplace to go."

"Words fail me once again, and I wish more than anything that I had a glass of champagne or a line to make it all recede far into the distance, to make everything hazy and unreal again."

Rating: 5/5 

~Giveaway~
Giving away my ARC!
This one was read by a couple people but still in pretty good shape. 
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